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Tuesday, January 13, 2009

OMG, 2 posts in one week!!!

I got this as an email from a co-worker. It is hilarious and sad all at the same time. Enjoy!

It's time again for the annual "Stella Awards." For those unfamiliar with
these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled
hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico
where she purchased the coffee.
You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees
while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing
that, right?

That's right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts
in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch your head.
So keep your head scratcher handy. These are also the people that vote in
this country!

Here are the Stella's for the past year:


7TH PLACE:

Kathleen Robertson of Austin , Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her
peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised
by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

6TH PLACE:

Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car
when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

Go ahead, grab your head scratcher.


5TH PLACE:

Terrence Dickson, of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just
burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic
garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to
open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the
garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for
eight, count 'em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog
food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental
anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson
$500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish.

Keep scratching. There are more...

4TH PLACE:

Jerry Williams, of Little Rock , Arkansas , garnered 4th Place in the Stella's
when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the
butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a
chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked
for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the
time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the
yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

Grrrrr .... Scratch, scratch.

3RD PLACE:

Third place goes to Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury
ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a
spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on
the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 second s earlier
during an argument. What ever happened to people being responsible for
their own actions?

Scratch, scratch, scratch. Hang in there; there are only two more Stellas
to go...

2ND PLACE:

Kara Walton, of Claymont, Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a
nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking
out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through
the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said
the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses.
Go figure.


1ST PLACE : (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please)

This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski,
of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago motor
home. On her first trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto
the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the
driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a
sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and
overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's
seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are
you sitting down, $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually
changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski
has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.


Are we, as a society, getting more stupid...or what? Someone forgot to mention that the jury in all those cases were stupid.

4 comments:

Ashley said...

Those are insane! What happened to personal responsibility and common sense. Wow!

Anonymous said...

Seriously. This makes me want to hurt these people and even more so the people who actually awarded them money. Argh.

Bethany said...

OH.MY.GOD!

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry what now?

If she can do that then I'm going to go ahead with my frivolous lawsuit! I've decided that I'm going to get my hand stuck in a Pringles can and then I'm going to slap Frito Lay with a big a$$ lawsuit...Hey I've got Student Loans to payoff...