Catch up here.

So, I never confronted him. To this day, I still haven't. I am torn between believing this other person, that truthfully has no reason to lie, and wanting to believe my husband. He is my husband after all. So, I didn't confront him. I did, however, confide in my best friend about what I had found out. I had so many feelings about everything. I was so confused and like I usually do, I made a rash decision. I told Chris that I did not want to work things out. I was so hurt. It hurt me to say that to him. But, I had everyone telling me that was the right thing to do. That I didn't need to be with him. I know that I should have ignored everyone else and let my heart and mind tell me what to do, but I was soooo confused.

After 2 or 3 weeks, I started rethinking my decision. Again, color me confused. So, I poured my heart out to Chris. I tried to explain to him how I felt at the time and how sorry I was for how I treated him and how I went about telling him that we didn't need to see each other. My best friend actually took my phone and sent him a few text messages. I don't even want to think about how upset he must've been. I tried to tell him exactly how I felt. And, he told me that it was too late. That we had a chance to work on things and I chose to walk away. I immediately regretted saying anything to him. I felt like I should have just left it alone. But, my marriage was and is important to me. Marriage is not something to take lightly. Too many people are so quick to walk out. To me, it's something worth fighting for. So I continued to try. I didn't do it the way I wanted to. I allowed Chris to set boundaries. Again, something I regret.

That's all for now. I think tonight, I will sit down and do some writing.